Howdy, Unreality TV readers! We’re planning a night of I’m a Celebrity fun and games to celebrate this year’s final. Of course, we’ll be staying completely impartial throughout this live coverage. We won’t be attempting to influence votes whatsoever.

Oh, yeah…GINO TO WIN!!!

Beginning with Justin’s elimination last night. Well, how quickly Mr Justin got forgotten about when everybody realised that they were through to the final. And Kim shed a tear of gratitude to the British public for voting her through to the final. The guys – Gino and Jimmy are a bit more stoic about it.

By the way…GINO TO WIN!!!

Kim’s trial

So, Kim Woodburn is up for the first trial. It’s called John Travolting, and requires Kim to stand in a perspex container in the shape of John Travola’s iconic Saturday Night Fever move. Once inside, they’ll fill the tank up with plenty of awful creatures. And she’ll have to stay inside for 10 Minutes!

They commence with cockroaches and crickets. Even though they’re only ankle deep, the bugs don’t hesitate in exploring the territory known as Kim. They throw in a few grean ants – which bite a little bit – to her leg and arm. To make matters worse, they dump massive spiders on her head. Cleverly, Kim submerges her mouth in the rubber band protecting her neck.

Next she gets some yabbies dunked around her left leg. You can see the green ants pulling at Kim’s arm. She gets some serious respect for taking this so bravely. Following this, they throw in some giant stick insects, which are horrific to look at, though thankfully she can’t actually see them. I’m thinking the perfect soundtrack to this would be Alicia Keys’ Crawling… (OK, that’s a bit of creative license with the title…)

Fair play to Kim, she’s won everything she could for the celebrity contestants. Well done Kim!

Gino (to win)’s trial

This one’s called Bushtucker Bonanza – there are ten dishes: five normal, five horrible. If Gino chooses to eat the normal dishes, he forfeits part of the prize. First, he’s given the choice between antipasto and fermented duck egg. It looks (and smells) vile, but he bites it anyway, gagging it down.

Next, he has the choice between rhino beetles or some delicious profiteroles. He suffers it nicely. Then it’s between sushi and cockroach, witchety grubs and a small handful of mealworms. I love the way he stops after everything he eats and opens his mouth to prove he’s swallowed it! He puts most of it away quickly, saving the grub for last. Yuck.

If he completes two more dishes, he gets treats for himself – and he wants two bottles of red a-wine. First, a plate of beachworms or a plate of bolognese. Not sure if sniffing the worms was a great idea, Gino (2 win). He chokes down some worms.

His final dish is a choice between crocodile tongue or a slice of pizza. Gino tries to give a critical appraisal of the tongue as he chews it, causing even Dec to gag in revulsion. He says it has the texture of octopus and the taste of rotten fish. I still can’t believe there are no side effects to eating all that rotten stuff.

Jimmy’s trial

Jimmy’s trial is called flash food, and he has to unlock a series of padlocks as the tank he’ll be in fills up with water. Oh, the padlocks are attached to him. As the water rises, they start to introduce yabbies, then water spiders. He gets the first three quickly enough – securing three deserts for camp. The next two he gets count toward personal treats for him. He gets one extra, but loses the other key underwater.

By the way, my preferred exit order for the final three contestants it Jimmy White to leave first, then Kim Woodburn next with Gino D’Acampo (2 win) taking the crown.

Camp Awards

The finalists get to dish out awards to the contestants this year. Controversially, they award Sabrina the laziest contestant award, and Katie Price the best breasts (are they forgetting Sam the Stunna Fox and Lucy Benjamin?)

Biggest exaggerator award for Joe Bugner and Justin Ryan, yes I agree with.

Third Place

Ant & Dec rush into camp and ann0unce that -yes- Jimmy White has finished in third place. Some people have called him boring, but snooker fans know that’s Steve Davies’ trademark, innit? Personally, I’ve enjoyed Jimmy being in camp. He certainly didn’t get as much screen time as some of the others, but there’s obviously a loyal voter base there who’ve been keen to keep him in.

Jimmy’s straight out for the interview. He speaks highly of the whole group, reminding us that you don’t need a show full of bitchy people in order to make an interesting programme. He admits that he came on the show to break some of his bad habits. He admits that he’s a lazy bugger and needed something radical like the jungle to make him change things.

Gino – King Of The Jungle!

Was there ever any doubt? The campmates are all gathered around the camp for the last time, and Ant & Dec announce that Gino is the new King Of The Jungle, with Kim as a very worthy runner-up!

We get some very nice testimonials for Kim from the campmates. Then she’s in the jungle studio for her interview, acting frisky and generally trying to dry hump Ant & Dec, who’re happy to play along. She’s a total live wire during her exit interview, being typically forthright about her run-ins with Joe Bugner and Katie Price.

Gino is totally effervescent when he comes into the studio, upbeat and looking forward to seeing his wife and kids. And then we get a fast-paced view of Gino shouting and gesticulating as only he (and the rest of Italy can). It was lovely to see his two boys running out to greet him after his interview. Such a fitting end to a brilliant series. Well done  to Gino and Kim and Jimmy!