We’ve just waved bye to Craig Colton over on X Factor, (it should’ve been Janet), and it’s now time to check out a mammoth ninety minutes of jungle action from I’m A Celebrity!
The stars are awaking, the sun is shining and everybody’s in high spirits after their night out at the jungle pub. Mark volunteers to cook breakfast, and chucks far too much rice into the boil. Antony takes over, even after declaring he wouldn’t be cooking anymore, and both have a little disagreement. Is the bromance dead already?
Time for Sinitta to go for her trial! Ant, Dec and a cage await her in the jungle clearing. This is the ‘Hellivator’. As Sinitta steps in, she’s shaking and rubbing her arms in order to prepare herself for what lies in wait in the depths of the water she’s being lowered into. After a bit of a slow start, Sinitta is locked into place, and the trial begins.
Or so I thought. Sinitta takes around three minutes just to open the first hole in the wall, which houses toads and her first star. Almost halfway into the trial, and we move onto hole number two which has a number of snakes slinking around. She passes and moves onto number three, the baby crocs. She collects another star and then says the famous words, “I’m A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here!” Poor show, Sinitta. Two meals for camp. “It’s just a waste of a task if she keeps getting voted for” – my mum raises a brilliant point. For the sake of the viewing public, vote somebody else in for the coming trials!
Now a segment for the men and the women! Mark Wright, Emily Scott, Dougie Poynter and Jessica-Jane Clement all scantily clad in the jungle pool. Definitely a sight for sore eyes, but if Emily doesn’t stop getting closer to MY MAN, there will be trouble. (I wrote scantily clad before Dec said it, just saying).
Now something a little less inviting… Willie Carson’s got his boobs out! He tells the celebs that the camp will be split up into two teams of six. Each day for the next three, the team will face a jungle game show where the winners of two of those three games will become immune from the first jungle vote off. Team leaders Stefanie and Pat each choose five people to join them, and the first game gets underway.
Who more perfect to host than Neighbour’s own Harold Bishop? ‘Beat The Bugs’ is the name of the game, and ‘Dart Attack’ is today’s challenge! Pat and Dougie will go up against Willie and Antony. Yep, you heard it right; Stefanie thinks an old pensioner and camp soap actor would be better fitted at throwing darts than an Olympic winner…
Pat and Dougie won the challenge, and along with an advantage in the next game, they had a treat waiting for them back at camp. Not only this, but the losing team were sent off to the ‘sin bin’ – their home for the night. The six miserable sinners had to stay in the prison, and Lorraine got a little teary eyed when Antony forgot to bring her her hairbrush. It saddened me to see Lorraine upset – I think she’s an absolute star!
The winning team were given their prize, which included mugs of hot chocolate alongside marshmallows and brownies. However, they were understandably told not to share any of it with the other six campmates.
Now onto what should be tonight’s most exciting segment – the live bush tucker trial; ‘Horrods’! The public chose Sinitta to face the trial – you all clearly didn’t listen to my advice. You’ll regret it!
Everybody’s favourite jungle medic, Bob is on hand to dish out some words of wisdom to Sinitta, and Sinitta has a look in her eye which made me think she’s actually really going to give this a good go. I was wrong.
The trial begins in the first department in the jungle store – the jewellery section. Two snakes have bangles coiled round their body, which Sinitta must remove. Plenty of screaming, shaking and jumping around along with aggressive hand movements, even when repeatedly told to ‘take it nice and easy’ ensured she took both stars from this section.
Next on to the food department where Sinitta is asked to taste two delicacies. In order to get a meal for each, she must hold first a Yabby in her mouth for twenty seconds. She manages ten seconds and then spits the poor Yabby onto the ground below.
Now onto the luggage section where three suitcases will drop nasties onto Sinitta, along with stars! Well, they should, but of course Sinitta is so panicky that she passes on this section entirely.
The Aquarium is next, and I’m crying laughing at the fact Sinitta nearly just threw a Yabby at the cameraman! She gets one star from this section, bringing her to a total of three.
Santa is awaiting Sinitta, and he has a special surprise in his sack! Inside his gift is hundreds of cockroaches and a star which Sinitta takes home.
She then moves onto the toy section where she jumps into a ball pool of gunk, adding just one more star to her collection. She wins a grand total of five stars, which means camp will receive five meals!
Tomorrow is sure to hold more surprises for the celebrities, and you can catch all the action from 9PM!
This article was written by our newest guest blogger Daniel Falconer. Catch up with him on Twitter @Danarazzi…he’s a funny guy!