Young Apprentice: Not enough people for a full Halifax advert

Alan Sugar’s back with another Junior Apprentice. Sorry, what’s that, they’ve renamed it to Young Apprentice? Right, just got the memo. Thanks Sir Alan.

Welcome to the first episode liveblog for the new series of Young Apprentice. We’ll be watching a bunch of upstart kids dressed in borrowed suits try to navigate the stormy waters of big business.

Tonight’s first episode is all about flogging ice-cream. Given the recent weather, I think we can assume that this episode wasn’t filmed in the last week or two! We’re five minutes in and the teenaged candidates aren’t remotely as annoying as their fully grown counterparts on the main Apprentice show.

21:11: The teams are settling on names – suggestions floated are Kinetic, Atomic. Nick Hewer is already practising his world famous grimace! Just like the school disco, the teams have been formed along gender lines.

21:13: Hayley Forrester has assumed team leader responsibilities for the girls’ team. They’ve decided to do fruity flavours with a “traditional twist”. The boys will undoubtedly choose to go solely with vanilla. Yep, the idea’s out there.

21:15: The boys agree on a cookie-based strategy, but James immediately sets himself apart as the group naysayer and gets quickly brushed aside by everybody else. Way to let the side down, Northern Irish lad! James goes on to suggest a baffling range of pirate-inspired catchphrases. Yes, his speciality is economics not marketing.

21:17: Back to the girls, and there are two main ideas on the go: one is “Treat the lips, trim the hips”, the other is the dreadfully cliched “I scream…” Bleugh.

21:22: Instant anarchy as GCSE maths teaching fails our intrepid businesspersons! Ingredients are mis-measured, and kitchen disasters abound as the apprentices  start to bicker and shift the blame. A whole batch of ice-cream mix is thrown out because of the horrendous error. At this point we’re wondering how Nick Hewer keeps quiet and let’s them make such massive screw-ups!

21:25: Boy team heads to the seaside with their treasure chest of treats and ridiculous pirate catchphrases. Outspoken James tries to change the pricing structure to £1, but Karren Brady thinks that even £1.50 is too cheap on such a hot day. Elsewhere, the girls’ team has passed on the cost of their screw-up on to the customer – an extortionate £3 per scoop.

21:28: Ouch! The girls are even charging extra for the cone. What if you don’t want one – will they just dumpo the ice-cream in your hand?

21:31: Captain Vanilla (aka James) is really annoying. We’re from Northern Ireland and his voice is cutting through our heads! Luckily, more sensible heads prevail and the boys go directly onto the beach and start selling the ice-cream to sunbathers.

21:33: The girls discover that they’ve got a lot of excess ice-cream in their van. Oops! Someone’s going to get a roasting for this gaffe! Both teams seem to end the day with all their stock sold – but whose pricing strategy will have reaped the biggest profit? Will the girls cover their losses on the wasted ice-cream mix?

21:36: The boys are surprisingly together in the boardroom. Well, until James disagrees with Mahamed on who came up with the awful pirate theme. In fairness to James, he stuck to his annoying pirate theme right to the end. The girls have to admit to their “out of control” manufacturing process, which Lord Sugar says “Never mind Ben & Jerry, it’s more like Tom & Jerry”. He’s even aghast when he discovers the girls charged for the cone.

21:40: Boys make a profit of £559.29. The girls made a profit of £708.34. Ripping off your customers for the win! And this’ll see the boys’ team at each other’s throats!

21:44: No messing from Harry Hitchens – he accuses James of being like a bulldozer throughout the task. Muhamed – who had no apparent talent through the task – seems to be particularly adept at defending himself from criticism. James is taking criticism for trying to undercut themselves at the start.

21:49: Lord Sugar turns his attention to the Watermelon and Apple ice-cream flavour. Which mentalist came up with that one? James, Muhamed and Harry are coming back to the boardroom. James tries to pull a Tim Campbell stunt, but he’s simply not likeable enough for it to work.

21:51: James might as well paint a giant target on his face. He has an alarming ability to irritate everyone around him. Muhamed however shows a startlingly bad attitude – he’s incredibly arrogant and aggressive when provoked. But Sugar keeps us guessing right up to the end – he points out the flaws with each candidate, but ultimately ejects Muhamed from the process.

21:56: A final word of warning from Lord Sugar to James: “Watch it. Cos I’m watching you.” I’d say Sugar will have a low tolerance for egomaniacs like James. And on the flip side, James has managed to piss of everyone in the group, which means any wrong move will have him straight back in that boardroom next week.

Next week: The candidates are tasked with creating an innovative new baby product. Recipe for disaster…

Other takes: I was blown away by the wonderful rival liveblog (or “rivelog” as they put it!) on Tellysquawks – their Apprentice liveblog post is thoroughly recommended if you’re in need of a laugh! You can also follow them on Twitter @tellysquawks is you like that kind of thing!

View the original post Young Apprentice 2011: First episode liveblog! on Unreality TV

Matt Flint

We’d had the winner of So You Think You Can Dance 2011 predicted weeks ago: it was always going to be a bloke, and it was most likely to be Matt Flint.

The charismatic tap-dancer was a clear viewer favourite throughout the series – and he’d never been in the bottom two dance-offs. For my money, I preferred the masculinity and poise of Luke Jackson, but it was clear that the public loved the cheeky chappie in the tap shoes.

Tonight’s elimination order was predictable, but also fair: Kirsty Swain was first to leave the final, but she’d taken a lot of criticism in recent weeks for her lack of technique. And while Kirsty was praised by the judges for her ability to entertain (and also for overcoming her hearing problems to dance so successfully), she was clearly the weakest technical dancing. Next to leave was pink-haired Katie Love, who had performed incredibly well during the final. However, since SYTYCD crowns its winner as “Britain’s Favourite Dancer”, Katie couldn’t match up to the two strongest dancers in the competition.

And those were obviously the very accomplished Matt Flint and Luke Jackson. In my opinion, both were at their strongest tonight during their dual tap-dance routine. Luke showed that he could match Matt at his own game. However, it was clear that in a popularity contest, Matt was always going to come up trumps.

Personally, I’d been rooting for Luke to win – Nigel’s comments the other week about the end of the Billy Elliott mentality (that dancing is embarrassing and effeminate) obviously applied more to Luke than any other contestant. However, there’s no doubt that Matt deserves the title of Britain’s Favourite Dancer. His tap-dancing was always top notch, but as we noted last week, Matt had the diversity to tackle every other discipline in the competition and then he began applying those new skills to his solo routines.  A worthy winner, but as Nigel Lythgoe said at the end of the show – “the real winner is dance”.

No, I didn’t understand that statement either. But what I will say is that all of the So You Think You Can Dance contestants have a bright future in dance. That’s the best thing about this show for me: that it acts as a showcase for talented dancers. Sure there’s a cash prize, but the real prize is the exposure that the dancers get. Arlene Phillips mentioned that already contestants are getting calls for work based on their appearance on the show. And did you know that one of Jennifer Lopez’s dancers on the results show was a contestant on the American version of the show?

View the original post Who won So You Think You Can Dance 2011? Tap-dancing Matt Flint! on Unreality TV

Edna Agbarha

Doing his bit for the entrepreneurial agenda in Great Britain, Lord Sugar gives The Apprentices a salvage task tonight to prove to them (and to we aspiring binmen at home) that you can make money from any old (s)crap.

That’s right – Teams Venture and Tragic Logic were sent off to pick up commercial junk, cream off the valuable goods within and flog it on at a profit. While spending as little as possible on actually skipping rubbish that was leftover.

Helen Milligan, having had a successful run for five weeks on Team Venture gets sent to work with the losers on Team Logic. She’s not a happy bunny, but she dives in as Project Manager and makes the best of a bad lot. After all, she’s got Norn Iron Jim on her side.

While the Ladies Of Logic (calendar coming out next year, folks) adopt the risky strategy of removing rubbish for free, Jim and Tom drive round the streets with a megaphone blasting out their request for rubbish. As Lord Sugar later points out, it’s all very Steptoe and Son. Their strategy doesn’t yield much in the way of lucrative work, but at least it gave us a giggle.

Even though the business sense of Logic’s free removals seems like a risky strategy, it has one profound effect – they win two tenders set up by Sugar, blocking the opposing team and forcing them to be more entrepreneurial in their approach.

Over on Team Venture, Zoe Beresford has assumed leadership from a dithering group. But Zoe’s blundering management style doesn’t go down too well, and she makes a fundamental mistake of misunderstanding the business model in the scrap trade. To be fair, I think I misunderstood the business model as well. Even Alan Sugar had raised an eyebrow at Logic’s free service earlier, so it was a surprise when he was also sceptical about Zoe’s insistence on charging a nominal fee for removals.

Susan Hu discovered Zoe’s sharp tongue when she timidly suggested that perhaps they should be paying for the scrap, particularly for the secondhand office equipment. Zoe at first looked at Susan as if she was mad, then later asked her if she was deliberately trying to sabotage the task. Apparently not, as it later became clear that if they’d offered a fee for the office equipment, they’d have won the load and made a profit selling it on. Uh-oh.

Also notable was Jim and Tom getting screwed over by a builder who gave them a substantial load of scrap to take away – but when they were dumping the first load, he filled the yard up with yet more scrap. Jim was incensed by this and began arguing, but was hurried on by Melody.

Winning team

Having Helen Milligan on their team was a lucky stroke for Logic – their first win in the series so far. Of course, it looks pretty good for Helen too, because she’s never been on the losing team. However, despite winning the task, Logic were only £6 ahead of Venture – the smallest margin in Apprentice history according to Dara O’Briain on the BBC Two You’re Fired show.

Boardroom and firing

As team leader, Zoe Beresford had to come back into the boardroom with two candidates. It was a bit of a shock when she chose Edna Agbarha, to be honest. Maybe I bought into Edna’s self-praise, but it did seem that she scored the plumbers’ yard gig that made the team a fair bit of money. For my money, Susan Hu didn’t seem too active in this task, but Zoe herself was belligerent and irritating as a leader. I didn’t like her attitude at all.

However, with three strong female personalities on the chopping block, you could be sure nobody was leaving without a fight. Edna steadfastly held her position, and Susan was surprisingly forthright about Zoe’s behaviour throughout the task. In fact, she convincingly painted Zoe as an ineffective leader – particular the pathetic crying after they lost the two tenders – and not someone who contributed to the task.

Bizarrely, it was Edna who attracted Lord Sugar’s attention when she started waffling about her MBA and her off-the-wall qualifications. I think it may have been the claim that she coached company directors in how to improve their businesses that blew things for Edna. With that, Sugar swiped Zoe’s pathetic leadership aside and aimed his Finger Of Doom at Edna instead. To be honest, I’d expected her to be in the running for a lot longer because she talks a good game and seems quite ferocious. Ultimately, Sugar told her that he couldn’t see himself working with someone like Edna.

If that’s the case, I can’t see him working with either Zoe or Susan either. But we can’t have serial firings every week, can we?

View the original post Apprentice 2011: Edna Agbarha eliminated in junk salvage task on Unreality TV

Bethany Rose Harrison

It’s the week of the So You Think You Can Dance semi-finals, so whoever goes is going to have a pretty solid fanbase. So, if you were one of those people rooting for Bethany Rose Harrison or Lee Bridgman, get your box of tissues at the ready…

In tonight’s elimination show (how did they fit all that into a 20 minute show?), tap-dancing sensation Matt Flint and gorgeous Kirsty Swain (last seen throwing a massive strop at Arlene Phillips’ comments about her solo), both got through on the strength of the public vote. Which means they’re the ones to watch next Saturday when the final airs.

This left Lee Bridgman in a dance-off against Luke Jackson (no contest, really) and Katie Love squared off against longtime bottom two contestant Bethany Rose Harrison.

Luke gave a stunning solo routine in the dance-off, full of grace, power and flow. His statuesque physique and striking white-blonde hair make him an incredibly eyecatching dancer. Lee B gave a stock solo, which was good by his standards. But as I said earlier this evening, I just can’t relate to his style of dance. When it came down to the elimination, the judges sensibly chose to save Luke and send Lee B home.

Lee Bridgman - So You Think You Can Dance

In the dance-off between Bethany Rose and Katie Love, both girls gave solid performances. If I’m honest though, I thought Katie Love’s solo was slightly uninspiring. But I think it’s been four weeks in a row Bethany had been in the bottom two, and the judges couldn’t ignore their mandate to find “Britain’s favourite dancer”. If nobody’s voting for her, then she’s not the favourite. And with reluctance, Nigel Lythgoe explained that Bethany Rose was going home this evening.

View the original post Bethany Rose Harrison and Lee Bridgman leave So You Think You Can Dance on Unreality TV

Tonight’s episode of The Apprentice had the two teams creating, branding and pitching new pet food products. Unusually, the success in the task wouldn’t be determined by sales figures, but at Lord Sugar’s discretion based on what his various advisors told him about each team’s work.

Once again, the candidates were split into groups. Vincent Disneur was assigned by Sugar to be project manager for Team Logic (later to be dubbed Team Tragic), while the abrasive Glenn Ward led Team Venture. Vincent’s team were told to develop a pet food product for dogs while Venture were given cats.

Early failures

Arguably both teams were led to early failures by their project managers. Vincent’s team had already decided that they were creating a ‘universal’ dog food product that would suit every type of dog. However, in a focus group meeting that included a vet, they were told that nutritionally a one-size-fits-all solution wouldn’t work for every dog. And it may alienate and upset some dog owners.

How do you deal with discovering bad news in a focus group meeting? You simply ignore the stupid vet and steamroller on.

Likewise, Glenn steers Team Venture down a blind alley. Despite Leon having a quirky and fun suggestion of “Lucky Fish” as a product name, Glenn makes meditation noises as he gets into his “designer zone”…and comes up with an embarrassingly bad pun on cat’s eyes. Not content with the inexplicable “Cat Size” as a brand, he throws in the awful “see their light” as a slogan. Good lord.

There’s not really that much to report on this episode though. For the most part, the teams work rather well on their tasks. There’s good co-operation between everyone for the most part, although both project managers are frustratingly dismissive of their subordinates. Except…

Vincent and Jim’s Bromance

Yep. It’s Nick Hewer who warns us that Vincent is leaning a little too much on Northern Irish businessman extraordinare Jim Eastwood. And it’s kind of true – Vincent seems to defer a lot to Jim.

Until they get into the boardroom. When Lord Sugar asks Vincent whose idea the product name was, Vincent mumbles, trying to find a way to explain the name as a team effort. Jim takes no crap – he puts his hand up and takes credit for the name. It’s typical of Jim’s take-no-prisoners attitude in the boardroom. But more on that later.

Team Venture Win With Cat Size

You could say that Lord Sugar “saw their light”, but the overwhelming feedback from the industry experts was that Team Venture’s product and campaign was the best realised. They had praise for the advert, which was managed and shot by Natasha Scribbins, and said that the product itself “could actually go out on the shelves”. However, Glenn’s one big point of input – the brand name – was frequently ridiculed, the play on words being utterly irrelevant for the kind of product it was.

Jim gets a little overconfident

He’s been a favourite of ours since his boardroom confrontation a few weeks ago, but Jim Eastwood may have stuck his neck out too far tonight. Jim clearly knows how good he is, but he vociferously defended himself against criticism tonight, even sniping back at Karren Brady and Lord Sugar. And while being a little bit hard-nosed can be entertaining and show Sugar that he means business, I doubt I was the only one shouting at the telly tonight: “Jim, sit down and shut the hell up!”

Surprisingly, he inspired enough loyalty from Vincent that he avoided being brought back into the boardroom, despite being at the heart of the flawed plan. Instead, Vincent brought Ellie Reed and Natasha Scribbins back.

Natasha saved. Vincent and Ellie fired

If one thing about this daring move angered Lord Sugar, it was the fact that Natasha’s advert had been singled out for praise by an advertising agency and Vincent had brought her back regardless.

However, Sugar had harsh words for Ellie, whose input in recent weeks hasn’t been obvious. And surprisingly, she’s fired. This was quite shocking, because this task showed a clear failure of the project manager when Vincent decided to ignore the valuable feedback from the focus group.

Except…Vincent got fired in a shocking double-elimination that we didn’t see coming! Sugar was still incensed at Vincent’s decision to protect his mate Jim and put other candidates in the firing line. Plus, Vincent’s been on the losing side too many times for that to be ignored. And so instead of one despondent candidate going home, we have two.

I’m definitely a little bit worried about Jim Eastwood’s chances now. Hopefully he’ll wind his neck in (to use familiar Northern Irish slang) and toe the line a bit more in future. Nothing wrong with standing up for yourself, but I get the impression Lord Sugar thinks throwing someone else out as a sacrificial lamb isn’t a nice thing to do.

View the original post BBC Apprentice Double Firing Shocker! Vincent Disneur and Ellie Reed fired! on Unreality TV

Charlotte Scally

A shock elimination for Charlotte Scally on tonight’s So You Think You Can Dance, as she ended up in the bottom two alongside Bethany Rose Harrison. But more on that later.

As the quarter finals of the series draw to a close, tonight’s bottom four were Charlotte and Bethany Rose and male dancers Israel Donowa and Lee Bridgman. This gives us a good gauge for next week’s final, as it shows us that Matt Flint and Luke Jackson are the two strongest males (we knew that already), and Kirsty Swain and Katie Love are the top-voted female dancers.

Before we wrap up the post, here’s our take on the dance-off performances

Bethany Rose Harrison – Bethany’s solo routine comes across as a bit samey tonight. And the reason for that is that she’s been in the dance-off quite regularly recently. And while I love her look and style of dancing, I think Nigel Lythgoe will play the “public don’t like you” card tonight.

Israel Donowa – Israel. Good hip-hop chops, but another dancer got eliminated a few weeks ago for being limited in their dance style. And though the judges have noted Israel’s progress over the last few weeks of the competition, he’s miles away from Luke Jackson and Matt Flint.

Charlotte Scally – Just noticed something about Charlotte tonight – she’s a flurry of hair most of the time. I’m not sure whipping her blonde curls all over the place helps or hinders her dancing though. At the same time, Charlotte pulls off some breathtaking twirls during her solo, which impressed me more than Bethany Rose’s effort.

Lee Bridgman – Lee solos to a Led Zeppelin track, which is in keeping with his rocker image. I approve of the song choice, but I’ve been pretty clear that I’m not a Lee B fan. Sorry, folks. Bit surprised to see him in the bottom tonight, but this bodes well for Luke and Matt in the finals.

Elimination

Israel Donowa

According to Nigel Lythgoe, the panel were split between eliminating Charlotte Scally or Bethany Rose Harrison. He took the final decision himself, surprisingly opting to save Bethany Rose and send Charlotte home.

The reason this is a surprise is that Nigel normally acknowledges that if the public repeatedly fail to vote for a dancer, then they’re not that popular. And since SYTYCD is about “Britain’s favourite dancer”, it would make sense to save the dancer who wasn’t always in the bottom two! However, Nigel tells Charlotte that she’s not grown enough as a dancer, and that despite the disconnect between Bethany Rose (too sexy? too beautiful? too good?) and the public, he notes that she’s by far the better dancer. Interesting – I’d love to hear your thoughts on this!

More predictably, Israel is eliminated. For one thing, he’s been in the bottom two before while Lee Bridgman hasn’t. For another, Israel has improved as a dancer, but he’s still strongest at the hip-hop genre. And Lee B has been untouchable for weeks. Even though I’m not a massive fan, I appreciate that he deserved to stay.

Final next week – and I may be live in the studio! Squeeing with excitement about that, obviously! So, who do you think’s going to win?

View the original post Israel Donowa and Charlotte Scally voted off So You Think You Can Dance tonight on Unreality TV

Welcome to Unreality TV’s live So You Think You Can Dance chart. It’s the final eight performances tonight. The couples have been mixed up at random. And as of tonight, you can vote for the dancers individually.

Just as we did for last week’s show, we’ve taken each performance and rated them according to who we thought was best. We’ve got the couples’ performances upfront, but each dancer did a solo routine – you’ll have to read on for our rating of the soloists!

1. Kirsty Swain and Matt Flint – Oh, this rhumba just oozes sexiness. Aside from the fact that Matt and Kirsty are avery attractive pairing, the pair move together so sensuously that the whole routine sizzles, from start to finish. Won. Der. Ful. Nigel also uses the word sensual (and sensational in relation to Kirsty’s figure), and has big praise for Matt’s dancing and his role as a dance partner. Arlene tells Kirsty that she’s “redeemed yourself after that appalling solo”. Sisco called the routine sexual and “very believable”.
   
2. Bethany Rose Harrison and Luke Jackson – Neither too happy about selecting a hip-hop routine, Bethany Rose and Luke give us a fiery break-up themed routine. We’ve had quite a few of these during the series, but this is angry, violent and thrilling. At one point, Bethany Rose runs up Luke’s back! Sisco calls Luke phenomenal, but hates on Bethany’s attitude during the VT footage. Louise has some reservations for Bethany, but calls it a good effort. Arlene is bubbling over with enthusiasm when she calls Luke “Olympic” (good word – want a job at Unreality Towers, Arlene?)
   
3. Katie Love and Israel Donowa - Drawing the scorching Broadway routine Roxy from Chicago, Katie and Israel pull off a few breathtaking moves during their routine. But surprisingly, Katie doesn’t command the stage quite as I’d expect Roxy Hart to. Nigel Lythgoe disagrees with me, calling Katie “every inch a star”. Arlene throws some criticism at Israel, calling his timing sloppy. Combustible Sisco disagrees completely with Arlene and tells Israel he was in a different league, and tells Katie that she’s finally got the partner she deserves.
4. Lee Bridgman and Charlotte Scally – I’m not normally a fan of Lee B’s dancing, but this team-up with Charlotte is an inspired choice. Dancing dressed as a wartime GI and his lover, the pair give a romantic, passionate spin on Unchained Melody. Louise Redknapp comments “that was amazing storytelling”. Lee also draws praise from Arlene Phillips, but Charlotte comes in for some criticism for not acting the “pain” very well. And – ouch – Nigel Lythgoe simply didn’t like the routine at all.

Solo performances

1. Bethany Rose Harrison – First solo of the night sees Bethany Rose whirling across the stage in a glorious blue dress. After having seen Bethany in far too many dance-offs, we know that she’s actually a formidable solo performer. Her solo did not disappoint.
2. Matt Flint – Have we ever seen Matt in the dance-off? I don’t think so, because it was so refreshing to see Matt free to tap dance for once. Brilliant, energetic and entertaining routine.
3. Kirsty Swain – Kirsty hasn’t made much of an impression on me so far in the competition, but she gave a bubbly, fun performance to Christina Aguilera’s Candyman, which I really enjoyed.
4. Charlotte Scally – An all-too-short solo from Charlotte, who plays to her strengths with a bubbly routine, looking adorably cute the whole way through.
5. Israel Donowa – Israel’s solos are always a visual delight. He doesn’t try to pull off anything too fancy here, but his routine has a nice hip-hop groove. Tiny bit disappointed that he didn’t do more with it though.
6. Lee Bridgman – Slightly inexplicable solo from Lee – very glam, but not quite as coherent as other routines we’ve seen tonight. Good technique, as you might expect, but when it ended I was bewildered.
7. Luke Jackson – With the body of an Adonis and the face of one too, Luke could just walk round the stage a few times and the female audience would be satisfied. However, he gives a trademark solo. And though it’s not his absolute best, it’s still a darn good effort.
8. Katie Love – A slight stumble at the end ruins a graceful solo from Katie. Not my favourite, and it looked like she was phoning in the performance.

View the original post So You Think You Can Dance 2011 – Top 8 Finalists Rated on Unreality TV

We’ve taken each couple’s routine and rated it according to the ones we liked the best. And since we’ve got two lots of dances, there are two lists! Have a look at what we thought and leave your own lists in the comments!

Oh, also no Nigel Lythgoe tonight, presumably because American Idol is getting ready for a spendid Season 10 finale. John Barrowman stepped in for him…and caused some controversy in the audience with his outspoken opinions!

First dances:

1. Charlotte Scally and Matt Flint: Drawing a rare disco theme this week, Charlotte and Matt are decked out somewhat predictably in all-white disco clobber. The routine starts off a little clunky and dare I say uncordinated…until Matt literally starts throwing Charlotte around and the routine becomes a little more exciting. Not their best routine, but still good. Louise and Arlene Phillips argue about whether Charlotte was the weak link in the routine though.
2. Bethany Rose Harrison and Israel Donowa: I really love these romantic contemporary routines, and Bethany Rose and Israel create a smouldering dance to Rihanna and Eminem’s Love The Way You Lie in a dramatically lit ring of rose petals. Sisco praised their performance for taking the audience “somewhere else” during their routine, while Louis Redknapp said that the couple have really come along in the competition.
3. Katie Love and Luke Jackson: New pairing after last week’s elimination, Luke and Katie seem to have a wonderful natural chemistry, even after just a few days working together. Another Rihanna song choice -Who’s That Chick? – but since when was that a bad thing. Really fun routine, if not technically very complex, they made it very entertaining to watch. Arlene calls the routine hot, while Louise feels that Luke is a partner who can help showcase Katie’s talents. Sisco tells them he thought that Katie now has to work to keep up with Luke…but not in a bad way.
4. Katrina Lyndon and Tom Shilcock: Opening the show tonight are Katrina and Tom. They’re doing a salsa routine which the choreographers claim could be very difficult to master in a short space of time. It’s a performance that failed to win me over, to be honest. Not so much caliente as…well, what’s the Spanish word for lukewarm? The judges slate them for their lack of chemistry and sexual attraction.
5. Kirsty Swain and Lee Bridgman: Drawing a hip-hop routine tonight, Kirsty and Lee play out a very trippy psychedelic routine to Age Of Aquarius. The look is good, but it seems the routine has changed since Kirsty bashed her face in rehearsal. John Barrowman comments rather fairly that the routine didn’t work for him and it just “didn’t work”. The judges’ comments descend into bickering between Barrowman and Phillips, but the routine didn’t work for me either.

Second dances

1. Katie and Luke: This was one of those moments where all the right elements were in place – beautiful song choice, Katie’s flowing dress accentuating her lines and adding to the grace of an already gorgeous routine. One of those routines that you enjoy so much that you’re a little bit disappointed when it’s over. Arlene calls them a “beautiful partnership”, Barrowman compliments Luke’s use of his height.
2. Charlotte and Matt: Wow. As Arlene said “a truly poetic expression of dance”. Where else on TV would we see routines like this? Graceful, emotional and just perfect. And to quote John Barrowman, “it sets the bar for the entire evening”. After a quite awkward first dance, Matt and Charlotte pulled it back with a flawless dance. Sisco Gomez even goes out on a limb and claims they could both be the final two dancers.
3. Kirsty and Lee B: Continuing a theme of strong second dance routines tonight, Kirsty and Lee B don their shirts and ties and do a routine to Tinie Tempah’s Pass Out. It’s a whole lot better than their previous dance, but as Sisco points out, it’s far from perfect technically, but he praises their ability to entertain. Arlene is audacious enough to claim that was Lee’s best ever dance. Even Barrowman is impressed!
   
4. Katrina and Tom: Clad all in black for their second routine, Katrina and Tom manage a far more seductive routine this time round. Katrina looking very much like she should’ve been in Liberty X in their prime. Sultry, sexy dance number, a big improvement on their first routine. Arlene however, didn’t feel the passion in that tune, Barrowman turns investigative reporter and asks Katrina if she has a crush on Tom. Sisco singles out Katrina for not knowing how to do “fire eyes”.
5. Bethany Rose and Israel: Groan…not the Charleston! I despise the very idea of this dance, but funnily enough So You Think You Can Dance always manages a neat modern spin on it. Israel and Bethany Rose manage to pull off some neat acrobatic feats throughout the routine, which I love, but these things always feel like they’re sketches from a silent movie. Sisco believes this is what Saturday night TV is all about, and Barrowman also points out the rough edges but praises the entertainment value of the routine.

View the original post So You Think You Can Dance 2011 – Top 10, rated by us! on Unreality TV

Ordered by Alan Sugar to find ways of selling the cupcakes by adding value to them, Rhys became the leader of Instinct when Tim Ankers declined the chance to lead the group. However, almost from the outset Rhys was unable to lead the team. His team mate Kirsty seemed to be coming up with all the ideas while Rhys took a backseat.

Even though Sugar’s henchman Nick noted how useless Rhys was, he stood up for the kid by noting that the team were totally disregarding him. Rhys explained this by saying that a team leader cannot function properly if his team won’t work with him. Utter nonsense, and I think it was a bit rich Nick standing up for him – because if the team had sold oodles of cupcakes, Rhys would have stood up as leader and took all the credit.

Unfortunately for his team mates Tim and Hannah, Rhys drew attention to their lack of input. This was fair comment, especially in the case of Tim, and Sugar was mindful of that when he summed up, insisting that Tim will be the team leader next week “whether you like it or not”.

In the same episode, Adam Eliaz was sent home after becoming ill. No idea what the illness actually was, but he was pictured several times throughout the episode slumbering in cars and looking lethargic in the kitchens. I kind of feel bad for judging him as a lazy bugger now that he seems to have been genuinely ill. No word on whether he’ll return, but Lord Sugar asked him to keep in touch.

View the original post Rhys Rosser fired from Junior Apprentice on Unreality TV

Welcome everybody – I’ve been chosen from absolutely zero applicants to liveblog tonight’s Junior Apprentice. Yes, I’ve been told I’m watching this. Gulp.

So, we’re getting a bunch of swotty schoolkids instead of the usual bumbling second hand car salesmen. Regular Apprentice is still postponed until the autumn, so we get six episode of this to compensate!

There are ten school children in the boardroom. They chant “Good morning Lord Sugar” like it was morning assembly. Er…while Sugar lays down the law for the apprentices, we get a shot of a kid with a full beard! Who is this wolf boy? Is he an adult apprentice in disguise? “But…but…I was trying to show Lord Sugar how enterprising I was…” He’s probably 40.

Introductions to Sugar’s assistants: Karren Brady (replacing sexy Margaret) and Nick Hewitt. He warns them not to mess up the house he’s (or The Beeb) rented for them. Arjun scares the bejesus out of me. He talks like he’s a veteran of thousands of job interviews. The others are equally frighteningly grown-up. Jordan is the director of his own company.

Tim Ankers (aka wolf boy) has a very unfortunate surname. Let’s hope he’s a nice guy.

The girls and boys split down the gender divide and are tasked with nominating a leader and naming their group. The boys settle on Instinct and nominate Jordan to lead the group. The girls settle for The Revolution and let Hibah be their leader.

First task

The kids get woken up at 6am for their first task. They file out, get into the customary black people carriers and give the cameras some smack talk. They meet Lord Sugar in his old school where he asks them to sell a load of cheese. Yes, cheese. £500 worth of the stuff.

Both teams unwittingly decide to sell in the Covent Garden area. Tim has the sparkling idea of “Credit Crunch Lunch”. Hibah does a quick stock take before setting out. The guys set up stall pretty quickly, but they don’t know their cheddar from their stinky bishops. And to make matters worse, Jordan manages to wrong-foot his team by being very clearly the delegator. He’s clearly got no intention of getting his fingers cheesy.

On the other hand, the girls seem to be running a far more professional outfit – Zoe in particular is a key salesperson. The boys eventually come up with their own strategy – the Credit Crunch Lunch, which they make for 25p and sell for £2. However, when the lunch trade dries up, the guys have to try new tactics.

For the next 20 minutes, all we hear are different voices saying “Do you want to buy some cheese?” Two ladies take the piss out of Arjun for his genetalia-shaped Italian cheese. Maybe they should hit the red light areas? This is the bit of The Apprentice I love – where the businesslike facade crumbles and the contestants look like desperate idiots. There must have been a few people munching on cut-price cheese at the end of that day, I can tell you.

Boardroom scenes

There’s some bitchiness among the girls between Hibah and Zoe – with most of them feeling that Zoe took over somewhat, although it looked to me that she’d got the most work done.

Sugar picks up on Tim’s lunch packs but questions why they didn’t make more when they proved popular. It turns out that the girl’s team make a profit of over £100, which the guys make a serious loss. Heads are going to roll. And it should be Jordan who gets the chop. The girls meanwhile head off to a top London restaurant for some swanky nosh.

The lads head for a cafe, and Jordan does the nasty leader thing, blaming Rhys for his bad attitude toward his leadership. We like Rhys. All of the guys begin floundering for excuses and pointing the finger at each other. Jordan brings Rhys and Tim back into the boardroom. To be honest though, I think it’s Jordan who should go. He’s being a bit slimy and selling out his team members rather than taking the blame.

I don’t know if you’ve got this recorded folks, but have a look at this Jordan guy again. Imagine him with a bald head, scar down his face and his pinky finger to his lips…he’s Doctor Evil! Thankfully, he gets sent home before he can hold the world to ransom with a “laser” and a miniature lookalike. What’s galling is that on his trip away from the office, he talks about how he’s “better” than some of the remaining contestants. Not your finest hour, child.

Gerry’s final thought

Like the Springer-ism? Hoped you would. Bit of a question for you, readers – how smart was it to put this on at 9:00pm? Surely it should have been on CBBC in order to inspire the new generation of Young Tories to start their own businesses? Instead, we had stacks of evil adults – myself included – sneering at these scary mini-adults and their premature business-speak. Just wondering (out loud) if this was a smart idea. It was certainly entertaining in a cruel, poke fun at the kids kind of way…

View the original post Junior Apprentice 2010 – first show, liveblogged on Unreality TV