Last night, Dogface decided that her hair needed a trim – and a brushing wouldn’t go amiss either by the way – so obviously, Lisa was number one choice of hairdresser…

And why wouldn’t she be given she has such luxurious and well styled… skin on her own head.

“I’m gunna do it bit by bit” said Lisa as she gathered up Sophie’s hair.

“You have to be careful because it’s so fine” she added as she went into stylist mode, though unlike most stylists, she didn’t ask if Dogface was going on holiday this year.

“You look like Lady Gaga” said Karly as she watched from a safe distance. Read more & comment »

Following their many rows, Lisa and Halfwit have made up this morning, as he predicated they would.

“I don’t dislike you and I don’t envy you because your family are rich” Lisa told Halfwit in the garden.

“No, I know” replied Halfwit.

“Sometimes people are scared to approach me” said Lisa, adding, “but I’m probably one of the softest people in the House”

Soft? Erm, ok, if you say so, scary skinhead lady.

“You wanna be careful with the acid tongue though” said Halfwit who it seems isn’t bothered whether he lives or dies… Read more & comment »

Karly and Lisa are out of tobacco, and their nicotine withdrawals are showing…

In the garden yesterday, with Lisa chewing gum in a frenzied fashion and Karly pacing like a caged tiger, the two contemplated rummaging through the bins for any sign of an unsmoked ciggy, but their conversation soon turned mutinous as Lisa ranted that other houemates had exchanged tokens for booze so she reckoned she and Karly should do the same for tobacco… Read more & comment »

Just as everything seemed quiet on the Western front – or Italian front – Lisa overheard Halfwit telling Charlie that he didn’t think she liked him much, and she doesn’t it seems.

“There are elements of this that are just nasty” Halfwit said to Charlie, to which he replied, “I don’t see nastiness from the people in here. No one doesn’t like you” he added, somewhat insincerely since he knows his best buddy Kris wouldn’t pee on Halfwit if he was on fire.

“I don’t think Lisa likes me” said Halfwit as Lisa walked up behind him.

“I don’t think you like me, Freddie” she said, hackles rising nicely and fake facial hair a’wobbling.

“I dislike you scheming against me and bitching behind my back” said Halfwit, taking his life in his hands… Read more & comment »

Lisa’s spent this afternoon shaving her hair off, as you do.

As Kris and Siavash stared on in horror, Lisa boldly took the clippers to her head but realised within a short time that she’d set it to a very short grade.

“Ahh, that’s too short man,” she exclaimed. “Too short. ****! Don’t matter, it’ll grow back” she said, quickly resigning herself to her new scalped look.

Kris looked like a slack jawed yokel as he stared and stared and then stared a bit more. Lisa noticed him gawking and said,

“You won’t like it because you’re not used to me, but when it comes through a bit and I’ve got me mascara on…” Read more & comment »

For a change – not – the housemates are going on about gameplans again this morning.

In the garden with Noirin, Karly, Charlie and Kris making up the audience, Lisa has been ranting on about Halfwit’s gameplan…

“I tell you something – he’s not silly. He’s playing the game, trust me.”

She then began pacing the garden, adding, “If you get too cocky with yourself, you ******* lose it.”

Yes Lisa, it never does to get too cocky with yourself. Yourself might slap you around if you get too cocky with it… Read more & comment »

For the latest news and gossip on Lisa click here

Lisa is a 41 year old butch lesbian from Birmingham who wants to turn as many straight women as she can.

Lisa admits to being a geeky and quiet teenager who came out to one of her teacher’s after being teased about being a lesbian. She has worked in various factories throughout her life and regrets that she left school before taking her exams. Lisa says that she’s learnt to go without, isn’t greedy and doesn’t ask for much.

Read more & comment »

Anyone who saw the Big Brother launch show tonight (and I can’t imagine anyone missing it!), will know about the first four housemates’ secret task.

Mario and Lisa entered the house as a couple, but after they were joined by Stephanie and Luke, Big Brother gave them their first task. Mario and Lisa must pretend that they are not a couple, but instead 43 year old Mario must convince the other housemates that he is with 19 year old Stephanie. If they pull it off, the four taking part in the task will escape next weeks public vote. If they fail they will all be up for eviction.

At the end of the launch show, Davina McCall announced that Mario and his new girl Stephanie will be getting married this Sunday, and they’ll think it’s for real!!!! How brilliant!

One half of the first ever summer Big Brother couple, Lisa is dating fellow new housemate Mario. The former bodybuilder is a fitness and health fanatic who teaches fitness classes alongside her regular job as a sales rep for tanning products. She is also involved in charity fundraising.

Lisa’s the proud mother of an 18-year-old daughter, and has a spiritual side – she believes in reincarnation, life after death, clairvoyants, ghosts, spirit guides, and universal dynamics. Lisa met Mario three years ago when she bought a crystal ball from him on ebay and met up with him to collect it. She says the most significant event in her life was when Mario pawned his Rolex to buy her a boob job. Read more & comment »